EIGHT RANDOM THINGS...

T-Hype tagged me yonks ago… and I’m finally taking up the challenge… this is eight random things about moi, Daddy’s Girl…

1. I love to laugh (and it's really easy to amuse me), but I can't stand the sound of fake laughter. It grates on my nerves. I hate it when people laugh even when they don't find the joke funny… I know it's called "polite laughter", but I think it's actually impolite, because it is always so glaringly obvious that the laughter is forced. I think that laughter is one of those things that's just impossible to fake.

2. I love heels… the higher the better… I love the way they look, and I love the way they make me feel. I never longed to wear them until I put my feet in my first pair – but from that moment on, a pair of heels has felt like home. I’ve never felt the slightest bit uncomfortable in them, no matter how high (in fact, the first night I wore a pair of stilettos, I ran a mile in them). Nothing against flats, they’re nice and comfy… but heels are just… tres magnifique.

3. I am sometimes really, really amused when I read the stuff that I write… because although I write the way I think, I don’t write the way I speak – at all. On paper, I am very wordy, ridiculously verbose even (summary was my worst part of English class at secondary school). In person, I am actually really quiet… interesting also in view of the profession I am a member (and practitioner) of. It’s one in which the common perception is that you have to be a loudmouth.

4. I love bookstores – I walk into one and I feel completely at home. One of my favourite things to do is just wander around a bookstore, letting that lovely "paper smell" waft into my nostrils, running my hands across the spines of the books, flipping one open at random. Somehow, being around books just gives me pure joy. One of my very many dream jobs is to work in a bookstore.

5. In view of all the gushing I have been known to do on this blog, it might surprise some to know that I don’t do romance – I've been told I am quite 'hard' and 'unfeeling' in this respect. I am not the least bit romantic. I can’t be bothered with ‘I love yous’ and Valentine’s Day and sweet nothings (ugh). Mushy stuff only makes me cringe and roll my eyes. So, no hearts and flowers in my world – I’m heartily unimpressed by all that… I enjoy seeing it in the movies (sometimes), reading about it now and then, and (strangely) I love observing it (and cheering it on) in other people’s lives, but that’s about it. It’s just not for me.

6. I hate food that's mushy, gooey, soft, baby-food-consistency-ish… eeuuww. I love food that's nice and solid and chewable.

7. I like to sleep with loads of stuff on my bed. It’s a funny thing – I feel really comfortable when there’s stuff around me on the bed… a spacious bed and uncluttered bed looks nice and fresh and appealing from afar, but it only really feels familiar and comfy when I dump some books and papers and clothes and stuff on it. This one really drives my mother mad. Wonder what it'll do to the husband (if I ever get hitched)...

8. I’m not very good with faces – I tend to forget people’s faces, their names too (gets me in a whole lot of trouble on a regular basis). But I remember the oddest things about people – their handwriting (I rarely forget a person’s writing after I’ve seen it once), the way they walk, the way they eat and drink…

Ok, all done…

I have so much to talk about on this blog in the days to come... coming up soon are some thoughts on 'Masoom' and 'Kabhi Kabhie', and possibly a little something on the excellent 'Chak de India', which I saw with Uzo on Friday night (if I can get over the hotness and charisma that is SRK long enough to string some coherent thoughts together)...

WEDDING FEVER - Inspired by a 'text-versation' with Uzo

Weddings… I am absolutely drowning in them this year.

The first wedding I attended in 2007 was on 6th January – my friend and ex-classmate, D, who I’ve known for well over a decade now, sashayed up the aisle in a gorgeous strapless mermaid gown. The most recent wedding I attended this year was a few days ago, on the 7th of July. This time it was L. L is the son of one of my mother’s closest friends, and brother of a close childhood friend of mine (a girl I have known all my life).

D’s January wedding was a stylish evening affair – the hall was lit up beautifully, and the guest list featured the crème de la crème of Abuja society. Everyone was dressed to the nines – this was a wedding strictly for the fashionistas and the ‘high society’ types (so WTH was I doing there? LOL). They even tried to do the whole invitation-only thing (very rare in Nigeria) – didn’t really work though. I really loved the fact that the wedding was very much D’s style – she has always been a very classy chick. It was still harmattan season, and I think it was appropriate to have an elegant, tasteful wedding at that time of the year. I loved the wedding – it was nicely put together.

L’s wedding, on a rainy July day, was very different – it was vibrant, colourful and intimate. Down-home, fun, relaxed. Don’t get me wrong, there was a big crowd there, but they were people who knew the couple well and were genuinely overjoyed to see them come together. Everyone was so excited and thrilled… and we danced… and danced… and danced, to the wonderful live music. Even the pastor at the service, who proclaimed his happiness that his ‘children’ were getting married, boogie-d down right to the ground. No-one outdid the radiant bride and exhilarated groom in terms of their joy and their dance moves, but everyone did get down. It was just so joyful and exuberant.

There was even a little Bollywood angle – at the reception, the Master of Ceremonies at the wedding went:

“You know the way they dance around trees so romantically in Indian movies? Now L, I’m going to sing you a song from an Indian film, and I want you to pick up O (the bride), and dance with her in real Indian-film-style.”

L was all too eager to comply. He lifted the blushing bride into his arms and danced gaily with her to the MC’s terrible rendition of ‘Dus Numbri’ (the title song from ‘Dus Numbri’, a cool 70s Hindi action flick that is extremely popular here in Nigeria but doesn’t seem to have made the same impact elsewhere in the world). The MC basically sang gibberish, except for the ‘Dus Numbri’ parts. Anyway, it was a really cute moment – corny, funny and really romantic. Then the MC jokingly tried to get O to carry L and return the favour – it was just so cute.

Anyway, in between D’s wedding in January and L’s July nuptials, I don’t even want to think about how many weddings I’ve been to – the number would be really crazy. And to think I actually haven’t been able to go to some of the weddings I’ve been invited to! Almost every weekend so far this year has been a wedding weekend. Over the 3-day Easter weekend alone, I went to 3 different weddings – one in Osun state (western Nigeria) on the Saturday, one in Delta State (eastern Nigeria) on the Sunday, and one in Anambra State (further up into eastern Nigeria) on the Monday. And I had to turn down an invitation to attend my cousin’s wedding on the Tuesday, because I had to be back in Lagos for work on that day (plus I was totally exhausted from the constant hopping on ‘danfo’ commercial buses and okadas (commercial motorbikes) over the weekend).

And these 2007 weddings were not the weddings of random acquaintances – these were close cousins (I come from a very big, close-knit extended family), close family friends, childhood friends, ex-classmates, mentors, “mentees”… people I dearly love – people who it was really great to see enjoying the (touch wood) happiest day of their lives.

And there’s no sign of abatement – for me, this happens to be that much-talked-about season in an adult’s life when all their friends and family are signing the dotted lines – left, right and center. And all the same time – like it’s some kind of race. This weekend I’m off to Kaduna (northern Nigeria) for my cousin’s wedding, and in two weeks’ time, my dear friend H will tie the knot here in Lagos. The week after that, it’s another close friend, Z, getting hitched up in Anambra State… and on it goes… right up to December.

I’m getting kinda giddy (but tired) just thinking about it. I mean, I love weddings, I love sharing in people’s joy and experiencing the richness of our cultural heritage (weddings are a fascinating window into culture and tradition – and I’m blessed to have friends and family from every part of the country, and practising different religions, which makes the learning experience easier and more enriching). Each wedding is different, unique. But, there is such a thing as overkill… LOL It does start to tell on you a bit, after a while… especially when you’re so tired from all the wedding activity (it’s a whole lot of work, organising a wedding) at the end of each weekend, and you have to keep shelling out all that hard-earned cash for travel expenses and aso-ebi.

(For the uninitiated, 'aso-ebi' is kinda hard to explain, defining it as a type of ‘uniform’ doesn’t quite cut it – basically it’s a practice that originated in western Nigeria but is now done all over the country. We make clothes (or headgear) out of a specific material and wear it as a mark of solidarity with the couple. Aso-ebi is typically worn by groups – the bride’s friends, the bride’s siblings, groom’s extended family, the mother-of-the-bride’s friends etc etc. A wedding might feature one dominant aso-ebi, or as many as a hundred different ones – depending on how many different groups decide to have one.)

I have no plans of curing myself of this wedding fever, though – I’m just going to have to sweat it out. Not because I am hoping that people will do the same for me (I’ve lived long enough to know that that kind of maths simply does not work), and not because these people would be really upset if I didn’t show (although some of them would). I just genuinely believe that I should try to be there for people I care about as much as I can. As long as I’m able to do so, I will happily share in their joys as well as their sorrows. And I do so love weddings… I really do. At the end of the day, it is really worth it for me.

All the weddings I’ve been at recently put me in the mood to re-watch (for the umpteenth time) one of my favourite Bollywood movies – one that’s a bit of a wedding opus. And this time I watched it with new eyes – will be back soon to let you know what I learnt… so I guess this is a prelude of sorts....

HINDI MOVIE SONGS I AM LOVING RIGHT NOW (or... DG rambles on and on about music)

WARNING: After finishing this post, I’ve realized I am probably the only person on the face of the earth who will enjoy reading it or find it even remotely interesting. All I really do in it is gush about songs and say how much I love them. So… umm… you probably won’t like it. But I will come back with something less… less utterly-boring-to-everyone-but-myself soon.

I recently became the proud owner of an iPod Shuffle, thanks to the benevolence of my brother who decided to give me his older model (thanks bro! I love you!) My Shuffle is one of my favourite possessions at the moment – I really love the fact that it’s a bit battered – it makes me think of my lovely, lovely big brother and all the hours he's spent with it. I’ve had a Creative mp3 player for quite a while now, and I love it, but the sound quality the iPod delivers is definitely superior, and the Shuffle gives me twice as much room as my Creative does – much more space to cram lovely, delicious, wonderful songs in. So much sheer bliss!!

My new (well, new to me) gadget gives me a new reason (as if I needed one) to rave about the music I’m digging at the moment. Music is not only my drug of choice, it keeps me barely sane and somewhat balanced and makes me a much better and happier human being overall – so I think it’s definitely time to celebrate it again on this blog – it’s been a while.

While I’d really love to rave about my how funky and cool I think Lucy Pearl were on their first album, my ongoing love affair with the ‘Dreamgirls’ soundtrack, my re-discovery of Michelle Branch (‘Tuesday Morning’ is fantastic) and The Cranberries (‘Linger’ is still amazing as ever), how much I love the smoothness of Justin’s voice on ‘Summer Love’, how much I love Common (I really need a man like him to write me some beautiful poetry and look extremely hot while delivering it – actually, no I don’t but I still think he’s very hot), how much I like Awillo’s ‘Ndombolo Cache Cache’, how MJ still is and will always be the king of pop even if he needs a lot of help, how great Mariah Carey’s voice is even if she knows absolutely nothing about age-appropriate dressing, how much I like Lagbaja’s sound, how fabulously and effortlessly delicious Aretha F. and Gladys Knight always are, how very cool I think Sound Sultan’s ‘Area’ is (very strange since I don’t like Sound Sultan normally – thanks Uzo for the hook-up), how there is just something so amazingly inspirational about Donnie McClurkin’s voice, how much I love Joann Rosario’s ‘I Hear You Say’, how much I love Jill Scott’s poetry, how catchy and cool I think Rihanna’s new stuff is (she definitely needs more ‘Umbrella’s and less tacky ‘I don’t wanna be a murderer’ stuff), how much I love the ad libs at the end of ‘Umqombothi’ and the way Yvonne goes ‘Um-qom-bo-thi’, separating all the syllables like that, how brilliant Brenda Fassie was (‘Memeza’ and 'Vulindlela' are beautiful), how Keyshia Coles and a killer backbeat and strings made ‘Last Night’ one of the only good songs on P. Diddy’s ‘Press Play’ album, how much No Doubt’s ‘Spiderwebs’ reminds me (in a very good way) of Blondie’s ‘Hanging on the Telephone’, how much Twista and Kanye always crack me up with ‘Celebrity Overnight’ although it’s WRONG, how crazy D-Banj is with his ‘no long ting’, how John Legend just might live up to his name, how Jay-Z has madd skillz and is super-talented despite my disagreement with most of what he says, how much I dig Keane’s ‘Everybody’s Changing’ and Athlete’s ‘Half Light’ and still go a little crazy for Franz Ferdinand’s ‘Take Me Out’ and ‘Michael’, how Robin Thicke can do no wrong in my book, how much I love Annie Lennox’s voice and ABBA’s songwriting skills, how much I miss Lauryn Hill and almost feel like crying whenever I hear ‘Just Like Water’, how much I enjoy the Sugababes and their corny but ballsy kind of pop, how sweet I think Styl Plus are on ‘Olufunmi’ and ‘Call my Name’, how much I love David Bowie’s ‘Thurday’s Child’ and ‘Life on Mars’, how much I enjoy hearing Bey really let it rip on ‘Lost Yo Mind’ (the song that proves that – OMG! She really has lost her mind – just kidding, but it is kinda crazy), how sexy Eric Benet’s songs were (maybe that should’ve tipped Ms. Halle off – anyone who looks that hot ( remember that so-sexy stride down the street, with girls on each arm, in the ‘Love Don’t Love Me’ video? So not very PC of me to find that super-cool, but I so do) and sounds that hot (e.g. his riffs on ‘Georgy Porgy’ which, BTW, remind me of Ms. Evans, who’s really coming into her own now) just might be, umm, a little TOO hot), how much I am feeling Kano (‘it’s just one of those days’) and Estelle (does she have new album out?), how much Corinne Bailey Rae’s voice reminds me of summer, picnics and warm moments, and how much The Osmonds’ ‘Love Me For a Reason’ still makes me smile every darned time (somebody make me stop!!), as does ‘God Only Knows’ by the Beach Boys (such a perfect song)… this IS a Bollyblog after all (maybe I need to start a music blog – but heck no, there are not enough hours in the day), so I’m going to talk about the Hindi movie music that’s making me very happy at the moment. Can’t believe I actually just wrote all that, guess I really needed to let it all out.

I’ll start with my more recent discoveries – I’m not one to listen to music from a movie before actually seeing the movie (I just don’t get the whole concept of doing that), but I made an exception for ‘Salaam-e-Ishq’, which was probably the first movie soundtrack I got this year. It was love at first listen. I love all the songs although I’m not too crazy about ‘Babuji’ (recently found out that it was a remake of a much better song from the 70s – not surprised). I think S-E-L have really outdone themselves with this absolutely brilliant set of songs. I love the Highland feel to the title song, the plaintive cries of ‘Rabba’ at the end of ‘Ya Rabba’, the fun playground feel of ‘Tenu Leke’, the danceability of ‘Saiyaan Re’ (so perfect for Priyanka), the way ‘Dil Kya Kare’ reminds me of how cute Vidya and John were rubbing noses on the train in the movie… I love everything about this soundtrack. It makes me happy. Bas.

Speaking of fun and upbeat music, I also really love the songs from ‘Honeymoon Travels Pvt.’ I think they are really ‘different’, borrowing from interesting influences – ‘Albela Albela’ has a fantastic soulful James Brown feel to it, and is really well done – kudos to the singer. I love the salsa feel to ‘Pyaar Ki Yeh Kahani Suno’ – I don’t know why but I especially love the ‘ek ladka tha, ek ladki thi’ line. For me, though, the ultimate jam of the soundtrack is ‘Sajanaji’ with that fab repeated line ‘aisa mera pyaar hai’– it never fails to get me dancing. Totally infectious. A great set of songs.

Still on the upbeat tip, I recently saw Saif Ali Khan and Rani Mukerji in ‘Tara Rum Pum’. For any fans of Saif and Rani (and I am one of them), this movie is a must-see. Rani looks fabulous and it’s great to see her (in the first half of the movie) showing Preity Zinta that she can do young and sassy just as well (don’t get me wrong, I love Preity, but Rani just rocks – go, Rani!). Both Rani and Saif were really good in this film – very nice acting, although the script could definitely have given them more to work with. But on to the music. My gem from this soundtrack (I downloaded it the following day, couldn’t wait to hear it again) is the fun, highly danceable, pop-rock song ‘Ab To Forever’, which was beautifully picturised in the movie, with Saif and Rani really getting down in the street at night in New York (I love the whole ‘West Side Story’ feel of the picturisation, love the way the number was lit and shot – it’s just, for want of a better word, hot).

‘Hey Shona’ is the token romantic ballad of the soundtrack, it’s an ok song, and the picturisation is so cute (love the little jig Rani and Saif do – and I just think they’re so adorable together) – but it’s just a regular ok song. The second half of the movie takes a dark turn (a bit too dark, some scenes were actually rather disturbing for a family movie) and featured some questionable moments that really should’ve been left out (maybe I’ll do a proper review sometime), and the songs from that half are less remarkable. The two ‘family’ songs (one of them, the title song, is semi-animated) are ok but nothing special. What I really liked, though was the sweet version of the title song that Rani teaches to the kids (who, by the way, are just too cute) – it’s stuck in my head now and won’t go away.

This year Uzo and I also saw ‘Eklavya’ – a movie that really features only one song (‘The Moon Song/Chanda Re’) – but what a song it is. I love that song, it’s beautifully sung and just so hauntingly evocative yet somehow so soothing at the same time. Love it. Another slow one I am really feeling is the charming and beautiful ‘Gudgudee’ from ‘Just Married’ (‘Baat Pakki’ from the same soundtrack is a nice jam BTW). And how can I fail to mention ‘Tere Bina’ from ‘Guru’, which I just cannot stop listening to? Fantastic, brilliant music – I love everything about that song from start to finish – everything. I also like ‘Barso Re’ from ‘Guru’ – always makes me think of Ash’s beautiful dancing and the great scenery at the start of the film. But back to slower numbers – I really, really love ‘Bole Re Papihara’ from ‘Guddi’, a charming Jaya Bhaduri movie I saw this year and loved to bits. The song is so simple, but so pretty and so sweetly sung. Lovely, lovely music.

I recently downloaded ‘O Sathi Chal’ from ‘Seeta aur Geeta’ (another recent viewing for me), and it never fails to make me smile. Fun song, and putting the hero and heroine on skates for the picturisation was a very nice – and memorable – idea. I am currently also loving the title song from ‘Do Aur Do Paanch’ which I recently downloaded (although in a way I guess it’s not really the title song, as it’s called something different). The soundtrack from ‘Namastey London’, another movie I saw this year (and surprisingly, liked a lot) can be summed up in one phrase: ‘waaay too much of Himesh Reshammaiya’ – but there’s one song from it I really liked, ‘Chakna Chakna’. And of course ‘Beedi’ from ‘Omkara’ is a fabulous song.

Ok, so that’s some of the newer (i.e. newer to my music collection) Hindi movie music I’ve been rocking to, smiling to, and just adoring in every way. But I have not forgotten my older loves, some of which I talked about in a previous post. I’ll highlight a couple here. Kishore Kumar’s voice on ‘O Saathi Re’ still does something to me – and it’s something wonderful; R. D. Burman’s music from ‘The Burning Train’ I still find totally genius and so great, the music from ‘Hum Aapke Hain Koun’ – wow, just thinking about it makes me smile and makes me want to sing each and every 10-minute song on that soundtrack – ‘Dhiktana Dhiktana’ is crazily long but I never tire of it, nor of ‘Joote Dedo’ or ‘Didi Tera Dewar Deewana’ or anything else on that soundtrack.

‘Veer Zaara’ – not a popular choice, I know, but I just love and adore this soundtrack to bits, can’t get enough of the lyrics to ‘Main Yahaan Hoon’ – sure, I don’t understand most of it except ‘I’m here’ (or something), but I just know Javed saab was saying something powerful. (One day I must make time to seek out translations of my fave Hindi songs.) I usually hate Bollywood remixes – it seems like they often just take a nice song and spoil it with some out-of-place bhangra beats, but there is this wonderful, gently soulful remix of ‘Tere Liye’ that I just can’t get enough of – it really lifts and (to borrow a Beyonce-ism) ‘bodies’ the song.

I still love ‘Main Hoon Don’ from the new Don and am still shocked that Shaan did not win awards for his rendition (although he did for ‘Chand Sifarish’ from ‘Fanaa’, which I must say he also did extremely well). Shaan, I think you were brilliant in this one – you definitely get my award, absolutely worthless though it might be.

I could go on (and on) but I think this is long enough – I still can’t get over the crazily long paragraph I did on non-Bollywood songs, can’t bring myself to delete it though…

...anyway here’s to more (loads more) brilliant, creative, sometimes rock-able, often very sweet Hindi film music. I’ll be seeing ‘Life… in a Metro’ this weekend, haven’t heard anything remarkable about the music, but who knows? Maybe I’ll be pleasantly surprised.

MEHNDI LAGA KE RAKHNA...

Today is a momentous day in the history of my country, Nigeria. Less than two hours ago on this 'Democracy Day', our third elected president, Umaru Shehu Yar'Adua, was sworn in; in the first civilian-to-civilian handover in the history of this nation. Although I don't think the elections were credible, I am glad that the transition seems to be happening relatively peacefully.

Three elected presidents in almost 47 years of independence - not a great record, but at least we seem to be on the right track. For all the problems and mistakes of the last eight years, I don't think any Nigerian would prefer a dictatorial military administration to a civilian one. We definitely have a very long way to go, and I am optimistic, not because there are lots of reasons for optimism, but simply because I think there is no other option but to stay positive and hope that our new leaders will work towards a better Nigeria. But it's not just their job, every Nigerian has a role to play, and I firmly believe that, working together, we can make it happen.

There are many reasons I love Nigeria - our wonderfully rich tapestry of cultures and languages, our amazing history, art, music, cuisine; the fact that it's where I was born (and have lived all my life) and therefore feel most connected to, but most of all I love the Nigerian people. We are resilient, resourceful, beautiful, talented, strong, sincere, proud, hardworking, independent... and we have a fantastic sense of humour - no matter how tough life is, we keep smiling and laughing in the face of adversity. So many of us have the capacity to inspire others in so many ways. I am really, really proud of the Nigerian people. Yes, we do have our flaws, like every other nation, and we definitely have some bad eggs among us who have not exactly painted us in rosy hues across the world, but the majority of Nigerians are good people.

Everyday, I come across young people with integrity, decency, intellience, grace and just sheer grit and determination... and for this reason alone, I believe this country has a great future, regardless of all the hurdles that we'll need to scale to get there. Our fathers may have failed us, but we don't have to perpetuate the vicious cycle by failing our own children. I am so glad that I was born Nigerian, I'm so glad that I live in this wonderful, flawed, blessed, infuriating, complex, wonderful, crazy, beautiful, diverse, frustrating country, and.. well, I just LOVE my Naija (to the bone, as my Jamaican brothers would say).

Anyway, since I'm apparently in a patriotic mood today, I thought I'd post a few photos taken during my cousin's recent wedding. My cousin is from the (predominantly muslim and Hausa-speaking) northern part of the country, which meant that we (the younger females in the family) got to have 'laali' (or 'laale') applied. (Yayy!)

'Laale' is the Hausa name for the henna plant ('mehndi' in Hindi). The crushed leaves of the henna plant have been used for many, many years to decorate female skin, in many parts of Asia, Africa (especially Northern Africa) and the Middle East. In the eastern part of Nigeria, the henna plant is called 'uli', I'm not sure what it's called in the western part (it might be called 'laale' there as well). As children, we used to pluck the leaves of the plant and crush them, then apply them to our fingernails for a reddish stain - we called it 'natural nail polish'. It's important not to use 'laale' that's been mixed with PPD, because that can cause severe allergic reactions.

'Laale' is a HUGE part of Hausa weddings, and the bride, her friends and the young female members of the family, usually get 'laale' applied to their hands and feet. As you will see from the pictures, 'laale' designs look very different from 'mehndi' designs, they incorporate the cultural insignia and unique devices of Hausa art. Naturally, the bride's decorations are usually the most intricate and beautiful, and she may get 'laale' applied to many different parts of her body apart from her hands and feet. It is also customary to do some special designs for the groom's eyes only - on a part of her body only he will get to see after all the guests have left. 'Our' beautiful bride at this wedding had really beautiful and elegant 'laale' done, as these pictures show...

The rest of us mostly just got our hands done.... in this picture, most of us still have the 'fresh' henna on (we had not yet peeled off the thick paste). One of these hands is mine...

I know the Bollywood connection to this post is rather tenuous (although 'mehndi' is definitely a big part of Indian weddings, which are a huge part of Bollywood films, right? And there is A LOT of patriotism in some Bollywood films, right? So, not so way off after all)... anyway, I will hopefully be back with something 'really' Bollywood-related someday soon.

TEN RECENT MOVIE-RELATED DECISIONS

Here are 10 things I decided from the last few films I (re-)watched… Bollywood and non-Bollywood.

1. Joaquin Phoenix was better in ‘Walk the Line’ than Jamie Foxx was in ‘Ray’. He deserved to win the Best Actor Oscar – pity he was up against such stiff competition.

2. I will simply never tire of re-watching Steve Carrell and the gang sing and dance at the end of ‘The 40 Year Old Virgin’.

3. Asrani has aged well and is still funny – noticed this from ‘Ball & Chain’ – which is a kinda lame movie.

4. I really want an authentic 100% silk kimono.

5. Randhir Kapoor really reminds me of a big white cuddly teddy bear.

6. Ziyi Zhang (above in ‘House of Flying Daggers’) is a fantastic actress. And the rest of the cast of ‘Memoirs of a Geisha’ is terrific as well.

7. They gave Reese Witherspoon a very cute wardrobe in ‘Walk the Line’. I doubt even the real June Carter Cash worse such fab clothes. Her hair is fab too. And Reese is adorable.

8. Daniel Craig is a really good actor. He actually (to my surprise) makes a good Bond.

9. I am amazed that Amitabh Bachchan can have made so many movies and still be so enthusiastic about film-making.

10. I need to get some more RD Burman music.

HILARITY, THY NAME ART ENGLISH SUBTITLES

English subtitles – I have to live with them, as I definitely can’t live without them. I may love Hindi movies, but I certainly don’t love them enough to watch them sans subtitles. It’s just too much work. After just a few minutes of dialogue, my brain starts to hurt and I just am not having fun – and as the main reason I watch Bollywood movies is to have fun, this is unacceptable. So I definitely need my subtitles.

You know, I imagine doing subtitles is not the easiest job in the world, so maybe it’s unfair to gripe about them, but really – certain things about them can be annoying.

1. Minimalism: Sometimes a character says like a million things but they only put one line of text up. Having seen a lot of Hindi films, I’ve picked up a bit of the vocabulary, and oftentimes I can hear a character say something (sometimes a significant ‘something’) which the ‘sub-titler’ just can’t be bothered to translate. Having said that, subtitles can never convey all (or even most of) the subtleties and context of the original language, so maybe I shouldn’t criticise.

2. English subtitles for English speech: Now this is a pet peeve of mine. English is English is English. I hate this practice, and it’s done everywhere, especially on news channels like CNN. Note to 'subtitlers' everywhere: stop making people lazy by subtitling just because someone is speaking English with an unfamiliar accent. People need to start listening… carefully. Different accents are a beautiful thing. We need to learn to live with them – it’s the 21st century, for goodness’ sake (and now I'll get off my soapbox). Usually when they do English subtitles for English speech, the text is totally different from what the speaker is saying anyway.

3. SPG (Spelling, Punctuation and Grammar) errors: I just don’t like them, in any context.

4. Not subtitling the songs: They do subtitle them sometimes, but I wish they always would. The songs are a big part of my movie-viewing experience.

5. White subtitles on a white background (or black subtitles on a black background): I don’t know how many versions of the ‘Ek Rishtaa’ DVD there are, but anyone who’s watched the one I’ve got will be aware of the fact that right at the climax of the movie, the subtitles get lost in Amitabh’s white clothes. As in, it’s absolutely impossible to read them. I also don’t like teeny-weeny subtitles that you need a magnifying glass to read…

But for all their imperfections, and despite the fact that they will never be able to pass across the full meaning of what’s said in a movie (maybe I should just try to learn the language, huh?), I do love my subtitles. In fact, I’ve been spoilt by them – I simply won’t watch a Hindi movie that doesn’t have English subtitles – if it doesn’t, it’s going back to the shop. So they’re essential for me, and apart from that, they’re also often very entertaining, as in hilarious. Just about every Bollywood movie I’ve watched has had a couple of really funny subtitles to enhance my viewing pleasure… here are some from ‘Vijaypath’ (starring Ajay Devgan), which I watched recently and may review in my next post, maybe alongside ‘Indian’ (starring Sunny Deol).

Ha ha... you have to watch the film to 'get' this, but it's just hilarious. And it looks even more hilarious in black-and-white for some reason.

I love this because as a kid I was told not to 'dirty my clothes' so often. I just like the way the words put across that scold-y tone.

Why do these action heroes always make women do these gory things? The things women "have to" do for love in Bollywood movies...

Go on Ajay... show them your 'stupid face'. I like this because I can picture someone saying it.

I just love these lines... and I don't know why.

Really? Ha ha. 'Cos I'm so not.

He actually means 'try and get me out of here fast', well as we say, 'idea is need'. But the bit I love is 'I'm here near the lion' - it just sounds funny.

EMMMMM... NO NO NO NO!

Hmm...

Here I am looking for info for my special 'All About Dharmendra' post to celebrate his birthday (it'll be up later today), when I come across a video on YouTube that is... hmm... well it needs to be seen, I can't really describe it.

I love Madhuri Dixit and I love Vinod Khanna, they are lovely and all that, but the two of them making out... no no no no, it's not a pretty sight. NOT A PRETTY SIGHT! I am trying hard to wipe it from my memory but I think it's lodged there for a while... yuck. There's nothing sexy about this scene, it just looks nasty (well, in my opinion anyway).

Anyway, anyone else who wants to traumatise themselves by watching this scene (not sure what movie it's from), go over to YouTube.com, and search for 'Vinod Khanna Madhuri'. It'll come up. I'm certainly not posting it on my blog, that's for sure.

It's kinda interesting, though, in view of the noise over the Ash/Hrithik kiss... I wonder if anyone got their knickers in a twist over this Vinod/Madhuri scene...

Well... back to work on my Dharam post...

BLOG STATS

I like to look at my blog statistics from time to time, just to get a feel for who’s been around, and what they’ve been looking for. The Google search terms people have entered (and have found my blog as a result) are the most fascinating stats.

Most often, the search terms are Dharmendra-related (seeing as this is – technically – a blog in praise of all things Dharmendra-related). Typical ones (paraphrased): ‘Dharmendra and Hema’s Bollywood romance’, ‘Dharmendra: Bollywood star as father’, ‘Dharmendra fan’, ‘Dharmendra handsome superstar’, ‘Best Dharmendra films’, etc. The most interesting Dharmendra-related one I’ve come across so far is: ‘Why Hema Malini still looks sexy’. I love that one. Not exactly sure what the Googler was hoping to find (night cream, milk baths, lotion, love, hair oil, sunshine, religion, dance?), but… it’s interesting.

There are other Googlers in search of a bit of Bollywood goss: ‘Friendship between Kajol and SRK’ was a recent one; and there’ve been things like ‘Juhi and SRK relationship’, ‘Kareena Kapoor said … (can't remember what)’ and ‘Aamir Khan marriage’ in the past as well…

Some Googlers are just looking for info on (and pictures from) their fave movies – there’ve been loads of ‘Yeh Vaada Raha’ Googlers, as well as a few ‘Dil Ka Rishta’ fans. Most Googlers that hit upon this blog are just interested in their favourite movie stars (apart from Dharmendra). There’ve been (paraphrased) terms like ‘Jaya and Amitabh Bachchan acting couple’, ‘Amitabh Bachchan best movies’, ‘Abishek Bachchan in Bluffmaster’, ‘Ash pictures in Veer Zaara and Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam’, ‘Jaya Bhaduri movies’, ‘Jaya Bachchan has said Kajol is a great actress’ (I agree), and so on.

And how can I forget the Monalisa Chinda and Mike Ezuruonye fans who always come by to nick my screencaps (from the Nollywood guest blog I did a while back). Can't hate though, I'm just glad that Nollywood actors have such a strong fanbase.

I know this is a slightly random post, but that’s one of the things I like about the internet…. Randomness is always encouraged.

SOME RANDOM BOLLYWOOD-RELATED MUSINGS

In my last post I wrote that I was torn between doing a 'Dharmendra post' next or a 'Bollywood post. Well, I've decided to post some randomness about what I got up to in the world of Bollywood this past weekend.

LAKSHYA:

I saw 'Lakshya', which stars Hrithik Roshan and Preity Zinta (Amit-ji too). Lakshya is one of those 'Jai Hind' patriotic war movies, and it's a decent effort, in my opinion. It's about a guy who finds his 'laksh' (objective, goal, focus) when he joins the Indian army. There was a nice love story, a little father-son drama, and some shooting (with guns, I mean). The only problem I had is that I would've like to see all the characters (particularly the soldiers) fleshed out a wee bit more, so I could actually feel bad when they were killed in battle. As it was, I didn't feel much (and that's not because I'm unfeeling - honest!) I think the whole story needed a bit more oomph to it, so I could really get into it.

This was quite an interesting film although I must confess that I zoned out during the battle scenes. I don't blame the filmmakers, I'm just not a fan of those scenes where all you can hear is shooting... in fact I'm not a war movie fan. I liked Hrithik's acting in this film, and this was also one of Preity's stronger outings. The music was partially very good and partially bad (but I would say mostly good). The tone of the film is a bit too dark, I understand the use of darkness as a device but it was a bit of overkill.

I always wondered why Farah Khan was always going on and on about Hrithik's great dancing skills (I always thought that hip action in 'Ek Pal' from 'Kaho Naa..' was annoying, but guess that Farah's fault). Anyway, I finally saw Farah's point in one of the musical numbers in this film (I think I counted only 3 numbers as it's a war film, personally I think only 2 were necessary). Anyway, in the song (can't remember its name), he was really good. It was kinda arty (by Bollywood standards), with him in a straitjacket at the beginning and end. Interesting (even if derivative) choreography... and Hrithik CAN dance. I now agree with Farah. His acting is really good in this film too, I think the young lad has prospects.

Amit-ji was good in this film although he seemed a bit bored and tired at times - and the use of darkness in most of his scenes wasn't particularly flattering. I once read a review of KANK where the reviewer said something like 'Bachchan's wrinkles are now too scary for the big screen' - think that was VERY unfair (I love love love Amit-ji and think he should go on acting as long as he likes), but... I was a bit scared myself in this film, I must admit.

Preity was really good in Lakshya, mad props to her. She plays a nice strong female (always nice to see in Bollywood). Her performance had depth, but I wasn't convinced as to why her smart and pretty character even likes Hrithik's character in the first place, as he is a total 'duffer' and 'loafer' and not even cute (before he enters the army). A charity case? Wan't convinced, but that's not Preity's fault, guess the scripting is too blame for that. Anyway, Hrithik cleans up really good in the army and becomes a different man, having found his 'laksh'. His ears are really big (as his army beret highlights), but he's still tres cute, and I still have a little demi-semi-crush on him.

Re-watching K3G and Mujhse Dosti Karoge (well, bits of them, anyway): I am not a big 'Kabhi Khushie Kabhie Gham' freak, but I surprisingly enjoyed re-watching bits of it. I steered clear of all the 'Poo' bits (where I come from, we flush poo down the loo), and watched all my best bits, which are:

1. The bit where Jaya B finally (after years of silent suffering - not cool, Nandini!) lays into Amitabh and tells him 'bas. I've said it, haven't I?'

2. My favourite musical numbers, which are, in descending order: 'Suraj Hua Maddham' (wet SRK!!), 'Bole Chudiyan' (this time I noticed they borrowed 'Wah Wah Ramji' from HAHK and used it here), and 'Say Shava Shava' (I always love watching SRK and Amit-ji dancing, but for very different reasons).

3. All the Kajol/SRK bits (except the super-saccharine 'Jai Hind' bit at their son's school).

4. SRK and Hrithik on the park bench.

5. DJ finally recognizing her Baaba.

6. Amitabh Bachchan breaking down at the end.

The rest of the movie can go down the toilet with Poo, as far as I'm concerned (ok, that was a bit mean, Daddy's Girl).

Watching Mujhse Dosti Karoge again was nice, too. Again, I tended to avoid the Bebo bits, and enjoyed the Rani/Hrithik bits more. It's a bit of a silly movie, actually... especially all the random Yash Raj touches (like the irritating 'uh oh' sound effect everytime Kareena says something daft). Kareena's character deserves a denseness award, but I guess that's not her fault. Her acting is actually okay in this movie (it's bad at the beginning but picks up about 20 minutes in), although anything is better than Poo. And of course MDK features the lovely 'Medley' ending with KKHH... why must Yash Raj rip off their music in every one of their films? I mean, enough already. But it was quite sweet here, I think.

The 'L' Word: Now this was a revelation... for those not in the know, 'the L word' is a slightly (actually, quite) trashy US TV show about a group of lesbians living in LA... their lives, their loves, their lesbianism, you get the picture. Sometimes this show displays a few strokes of genius, and can actually (at its very rare best) be thought-provoking.

A lot of the time, though, the acting is very very weak (the cast features has-beens (that's a bit harsh, Daddy's Girl) like Jennifer Beals from the classic 'Flashdance' (whose acting is actually quite good on this show, along with Mia Kirshner - feel a bit sorry for them when they have to say stupid lines and do silly things), and whatsherface from 'Foxxy Cleopatra'... oh yeah, Pam Grier) and the writing is even weaker. I hear this is down to the fact that the writing team is constantly changing, leading to inconsistency.

Which is a pity, as this is a groundbreaking show (in terms of subject matter) and, if handled properly and maturely, (which it is not) could raise very some interesting questions about women and sexuality in America. The show is now in its 3rd season, though (go figure), which I personally think is down to the fact that they liberally sprinkle each episode with some quite-risque-for-tv girl-on-girl 'action' (they can cos it's on Showtime). Just my opinion. Oh, and the theme song is one of the most irritating things I've heard in a looong time (sorry, I always notice the music).

Anyway, was watching an episode of the show and this girl who looks very familiar, with a crisp British accent and wavy brown hair, comes on. It takes me a minute (I know, I can be a bit dense), but I finally cotton on the fact that it's Rachel Shelley, yes, 'Memsahib' from 'Lagaan'! Yes, the one that sang 'I am in love, I am in love, I am in LOOOOOOOOVE!!' (with Aamir Khan). The one that didn't quite convince me that 'Memsahib' was actually in love with 'Bhuwan', and not under the delusion that she was starring in her own personal Mills and Boon novel. Anyway, Rachel's acting in the L-word is actually pretty good (although quite a bit of it, the episode I saw, was horizontal, if you know what I mean). I think, just maybe, she's going places.

And here ends my random musings... have a great week!