20 reasons why I luuurrve Bollywood...

While I'm on my self-imposed break from the story of how I became enraptured with Dharmendra, I thought I'd just remind myself and everyone else of the reasons why I love with Bollywood. After all, 'twas Bollywood that led me to Garam Dharam...

1. It's pure escapism. I love a movie that succeeds in taking me out of my world for a few hours. I come back into my world feeling refreshed.


2. The music is beautiful. I love the way the movies are scored. I love music and Bollywood loves music too!


3. There is a zest for life in many Bollywood movies that echoes the way I feel about the world and about people.


4. They are nice and clean for the most part... no unnecessary sex or gratuitous violence (although anyone who's seen SRK's 'Koyla' may choose to disagree about the violence).


5. They remind me of how much I love my family.


6. There's always a moral to the story... the movies remind me of important things I want to remember about life.


7. Cheesy they may often be, but I love the fact that they make me laugh, cry, sing, dance and express all my pent-up emotion. Catharsis is very good for the soul!


8. The actresses are so beautiful and so beautifully-dressed, and I get beauty tips, plus general beauty-style-and-grace inspiration, just from watching them.


9. I am intrigued by Indian culture, Indian religions, Indian food, and all things Indian... and Bollywood movies depict India (although this is not strictly true).


10. The actors are kinda hot sometimes. I especially like my SRK.


11. The emotional nature of the movies indulges my innate love for drama... and it's all external to my life. I get to watch and feel the drama without actually being steeped in drama in my everyday life. It's quite cool.


12. There are interesting parallels between the Indian world depicted in Bollywood, and my Nigerian world. (e.g. calling people you aren't related to 'Aunty' and 'Uncle'; the extended family system, respect for elders)


13. They are just so entertaining and FUN!


14. You can watch them over and over again, especially because the music is so lovely.


15. They kept me company during a low period of my life... and did a great job of it.


16. There is a lot of talent in Bollywood: the actors (see my faves list in the sidebar of this blog), the musicians, the playback singers, the stuntsmen, the costumiers, the hair and makeup people, the directors, the choreographers... when it all comes together it's like a colourful Holi festival of creativity.


17. They are unique, different from anything else out there... and for me, different is good.


18. The movies are deep... oftentimes they are multilayered, because of the highly intuitive method of filmmaking. The depth is not forced or over-planned, it's instinctive, and this makes the metaphors and connections even more precious when you find them.


19. They are colourful and can keep your eyes glued to the screen cos there's just so much going on.


20. You get everything in Bollywood: the more commercial 'masala' flicks ("Kuch Kuch Hota Hai"), the more serious ("Black") / offbeat ("Company") pictures, the comedies, the tragedies, the really good movies, the terrible movies ("Insaniyat") ... it's a varied world, contrary to popular perception.
    

I could go on, but it's 20 reasons after all. Bottom line: I LOVE BOLLYWOOD!

A Break from my Tale - and in its place, tales of 'Teri Meherbaniyan', Highlighted 'Packages' and Slightly Demeaning 'Rain Scenes'...

Okay... I've decided to take a likkle break from the story of how I became enamoured with my dear Dharmendra. I figure that the suspense created by this delay will be a good thing for this blog. Instead, I'm doing a brief review of 'Teri Meherbaniyan' (released in 1985), the last Bollywood movie I saw.

I was interested in seeing TM (forgive me, but I'm not about to write that long thing everytime I refer to it) for the following reasons:

1. It's regarded as one of the most popular Bollywood movies in Naija.


2. It looked mildly interesting on the cover.


3. I figured it had to be good to make up for a long name like that.
   

However, I did have my misgivings about seeing the movie as well... the tagline is 'the tale of a loyal dog' or something like that... and I'm not a big of animals in movies. I just think it's corny and kinda razz. That's not to say I've never enjoyed a movie with a dog in it - I did like 'Hum Aapke Hain Koun' and those Hollywood family movies - 'Beethoven', 'Benji' etc, but I can't say it's a big draw for me.

Anyway, back to TM. This movie starred:

Jackie Shroff: Ever since I saw this guy's extremely cringeworthy dance-moves in a Speedo, on the beach in 'Rangeela' (am I the only one who can't understand all the fuss about 'Rangeela'?), I've been like, what is wrong with this dude? He seems slightly... shall we say... eccentric (no offence to anyone who knows him, I'm just talking perception here). And watching 'Devdas' only added to my perception of Jackie - what a razz character with all the 'P for Pyaar, Ch is for Chand' stuff. BollyBob has a HILARIOUS Jackie Shroff expose here: http://dangermuff.com/bollybob/n_jackie.html. I promise you it is so worth a read. Now I feel kinda bad for bashing Jackie, though. I'm sure he's a nice guy...

So what did I think of our dear Jackie in TM? Well, let's start with the positives, Jackie was kinda cute way back in 1985 when this movie was made. Facially, he don't look bad at all. Actually quite hot. He had a nice trim physique too. Can't say he's aged well, though (again, no offence). And the 'hero' thing he did in TM was quite cool - though I can't say the same for the love scenes with him running after 'Bilji' as if to say na Olympics he dey train for. However, his hotness was kinda detracted from by the extra-tight jeans he wore throughout the movie - is it just me or were those jeans designed to make his package look HUGE? If so, they succeeded. And he also wore a T-shirt at some point that was emlazoned with the words 'Single Man'. Oh, the 80s!!

Poonam Dhillon in TM

Poonam Dhillon: Quite a pretty girl, she does an ok job in TM. There's a scene where she's singing in the rain fantasizing about Jackie's character and she's like totally drenched and rolling on the ground and... you get the picture. What is it with these Indian directors and putting girls in the rain with their saris soaking wet and highlighting every contour of their bodies? I think it's a bit much, all for the sake of cheap thrills... I will soon suspect that a lot of them are total pervs. I have to say my dear Kajol did her 'rain scenes' well in 'Kuch Kuch Hota Hai' and 'Kabhi Khushie Kabhie Gham' - she kept it subtle and did not go over-the-top with the sexiness. Way to go, Kajol.

Well, Poonam was ok in this movie and did her 'so sexy' thing competently, although I think they could've chilled out a bit. The chemistry between her character and Jackie's character was actually quite nice.

Another photo of Poonam... in the middle of a staring contest with Jackie

Moti the 'Wonder Dog': Ok, first I have to say that I don't believe this dog was not harmed in the making of TM. Is there anything Moti does not do? He worked harder than any of the actors on this film, I'm sure. He runs, he growls, he bites, he carries messages, he saves lives, he delivers messages, he bears funeral garlands, he makes his master fall in love, he cries (wonder what they put in the poor dog's eyes), he lights a funeral pyre, he 'kobalises' the bad guys, he watches a half-naked girl bathing and steals her clothes (a bit icky, I thought)... phew! This dog im suffer no be small... I guess Moti was ok in TM, since the movie was kinda all about him, but men, it was a bit too much. And near the end of the movie, a 'holy' cobra comes to help Moti out... men, dunno what to say about that.

The rest of TM's cast is quite good. The late Amrish Puri (just found out today that he died last year) does his trademark evil villain (his 'Babuji' in DDLJ and 'Sahib' in 'Koyla' were terrifying, in very different ways). Although Amrish Puri played mostly villains during his distinguished Bollywood career, I hear he was actually a very nice guy. Anyway, the rest of the cast is good, especially the guy who plays the mute character.

TM also has very nice music, put together by the talented Laxmikant Pyarelal. The music is lovely even if the sequences are a bit much. One of the songs with Poonam and Jackie is actually nicely done, until they start rolling around on the ground...

However, TM has a poor script and the movie does not flow well. Because of this, you don't really get to empathise with the characters. The most striking example of this, to me, was when Jackie's character (Ram) comes into town to see that something terrible has happened to his beloved Bilji (Poonam Dhillon's character), who was supposed to have been protected by Moti, the dog (Bilji locked Moti out when she noticed he was watching her bathe - again, icky).

So, anyway, Ram gets mad at Moti and thrashes him, until he realises there was nothing Moti could've done. He then apologises to Moti, gives him a nice stroke, sings him the title song, and then, with a smile (albeit a sad smile), has a nice meal of naan and rice (apparently prepared by Moti, cos I don't know who else could've cooked it) with his dear wonder dog... what? If I was Bilji eh! After what happened to her, it was a bit silly for him to sit down with his dog and wack bread and rice. Haba! He could have waited small, at least to get over the shock. Poor scripting!

To sum it all up, TM is a WACK movie, and I can't for the life of me understand why it's popular in Nigeria. Maybe it's another case of Koko dumping! Whatever it is sha, I would not recommend this film to anyone.

My second foray into the wonderful world of Bollywood (or, how I fell in love love love with Dharmendra - Part 2)

Okay, make I continue... so I left Nigeria for the UK in 2004 to go to grad school. In December of that year, I was in the US for my brother's wedding. One night, my sister-in-law called me and was like 'You have to see this movie'. The movie was 'Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge' (DDLJ), starring probably the most successful Bollywood movie couple ever (Shah Rukh Khan and Kajol). I love DDLJ, it's a great movie. The music, the dialogues, the acting... fantastic. Incidentally, DDLJ is the longest-running movie in Indian cinema history and has been playing non-stop in the cinemas for well over 10 years.

So I returned to London eager to watch more Bollywood. I intended to buy a couple of DVDs on my new best friends (friends to my book and movie-loving heart but enemies to my bank balance), eBay and Amazon; but shall we say I was overtaken by faaaaaar more significant events... which are beyond the scope of this blog.

So Bollywood took a back seat for a while... until around April 2005, when I visited my cousin Samirah in Dundee, and she borrowed a Hindi movie from a friend. It was 'Kyun! Ho Gaya Na', starring Aishwarya Rai and Vivek Oberoi. The movie was not terrible, but it dragged on for too long and bored me silly. Amitabh Bachchan was in it too, in a bizarre role... he kept saying 'Come on, Charlie'. I was like, Nna Bros, you be Indian abi you be Ghanaian? Didn't quite put me off Bollywood, though.

Around the end of my Master's degree exams, I finally got round to buying a couple of DVDs, and also got to break out my new (and first-ever) laptop which had a DVD drive. I was so excited! The movies I got, based on internet recommendations (I always do my due diligence on Amazon, Bollywhat, ApunkaChoice, the IMDb and a few other sites, before I spend my hard-earned cash on a movie) were: Kal Ho Naa Ho (KHNH), Kuch Kuch Hota Hai (KKHH), Hum Saath Saath Hain (HSSH), and Hum Aapke Hain Koun...! (HAHK). Thanks to my excellent homework, these turned out to be the perfect choices to kick off my Bollywood craze!

KHNH (see picture above) was my least favourite of the above 4 movies. It was a nice story and made me laugh, but I wasn't moved by Preity Zinta's acting. This was one of her less-accomplished performances. I loved the chemistry between the two male leads, Shah Rukh Khan (SRK) and Saif Ali Khan (they play friends in the movie), though. And the famous death scene, popularly known as 'the scene where SRK refuses to die' actually made me cry the first time I saw it. So all in all, KHNH is not a bad movie, it just wasn't the best of the lot.

The other 3 movies I am probably equally fond of... I love them all and have re-watched (and re-watched and re-watched) them all. KKHH (see picture above) is just adorable... classic Bollywood. SRK and Kajol, the perfect couple, are just awesome in this one. Rani Mukherjee, Johnny Lever (clown), and the rest of the supporting cast, are great too. There's a cute story at the heart of the movie (who can resist the old cliche about a little girl finding a new wife for her widowed daddy?), and the movie is also about second chances and friendship. Pure Bollywood FANTASY (as with many other Bollywood movies, there's not much about KKHH that is realistic. The music is to die for (and I mean, TO DIE FOR), the direction great, and I even managed to tolerate Salman Khan in this one. It's just a great movie.

HSSH (see picture above) is great too, and showcases an ensemble cast with Tabu (great as usual), Mohnish Behl (loved him in this movie), Karisma Kapoor (this was the movie that showed me that the girl can dance!), Saif Ali Khan (plays mischievious very well in this film), Salman Khan (again, could manage him here although he just HAD to take off his shirt) and Sonali Bendre (small role but she looked lovely). I like the message of this movie about love, loyalty and family values. Now this movie is realistic, even if very over-simplified and stereotypical. A lot of the messages resonated with Nigerian society. The music in this movie is absolutely wonderful, and the dance sequences are great too. Yes, it's cheesy, but it's Bollywood!

HAHK (see picture above) is another lovely movie. It is full of great song-and-dance sequences (in fact, most of it is one great song after another for most of this 3 hour - most Bollywood movies are about 3 hours long - movie). Although it seems pointless at first, the film really does have a story, and when they finally get to it, it's really moving (let's just say you'll need a hanky). I love Madhuri Dixit in this film, she just sparkles. Salman Khan is tolerable in this film too - it's one of his earlier movies - except when he says 'painting, bhaiyya painting' which is actually kinda funny. Mohnish Behl is cool in this movie, and so is the lovely Renuka Shahane, who plays his wife, Pooja.

So, I started off my re-introduction to Bollywood with 5 great movies - DDLJ, KKHH, KHNH, HSSH and HAHK. Kyun...Ho Gaya Na was barely watchable.

Check out their IMDb entries to find out more about the 6 movies I've mentioned in this post:

Hum Aapke Hain Koun...!: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0110076/
Hum Saath Saath Hain: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0216817/
Kal Ho Naa Ho: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0347304/
Kyun! Ho Gaya Na: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0349703/
Kuch Kuch Hota Hai: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0172684/
Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0112870/

Come back later, and I'll finally get to the Dharmendra part - promise!

THE BIRTH OF A PASSION (Or, how I fell in love love love with Dharmendra - Part I)

To kick things off, why not start with how I fell in love with Dharmendra? As a child, we never watched Indian movies in my house (we were too posh - ha ha). No, the real reason was that my brothers owned the remote control and would NEVER have let us watch Bollywood. Nahin! Bilkul Nahin!

Anyways, my aunt in Mushin was much more of a free spirit when it came to movies - she had 'Dus Numbri', 'Disco Dancer' and 'Mard'. And men, whenever we went to spend weekends at her house ('cos we loved going there), we rocked those three movies to the hilt! We knew all the songs and everything!

I also remember that at secondary school, this chick Bunmi in my class was heavily into Hindi movies... as in she had seen every single one. She and this other chick Bisi used to have contests about who had watched more Hindi movies. So from those aimless class gists we used to have when we were bored (you know, who has seen this movie, who has seen that movie, who has seen... 'The Sound of Music'... cue attack on the person who said that); I learned the names of other popular Hindi movies: 'The Burning Train' (starring my main man Dharmendra), 'Sholay' (Dharmendra again with Mr. Amitabh Bachchan - a beloved classic), 'Ghazab' (Dharmendra!), 'Teri Meheribaniyan', 'The Promise' ('Yeh Vaada Rahe'), '1960', 'Mother India', 'Nagin', 'Nagina', 'Dharam Veer', etc etc... yep those were the Bollywood favourites in Nigeria!! So I knew the names of all those movies but had never watched them.

Later on, when cable TV landed in Naija, we got Zee TV. On Sunday mornings, they would show some nice subtiled films and series, and I always enjoyed them. Eventually, I think they realised the NRIs in Nigeria were eager enough for Indian TV channels that they would pay for them, so they took Zee TV out of our standard bouquet of channels. And of course no-one was crazy enough (or passionate enough about Hindi movies at the time) to ask my parents to pay extra for Zee TV. So that sums up my childhood foray into Bollywood... fast forward to a few years later... it's all very exciting but will be discussed in my next post.

Catch you later,
Daddy's Girl