SANJAY LEELA BHANSALI: Sumptuous, Lush, Beautiful

It's been a while since I've done a Director's Round-Up... so here's one... with loads of screencaps... mainly of Aishwarya Rai... but please don't blame me for that if you're not an Ash fan - blame Sanjay Leela Bhansali!

I quite like Sanjay Leela Bhansali… he is a colourful figure – from his catfights with Farah Khan to his affection for kohl, to his occasional petulance and more-than-occasional pomposity; he has PERSONALITY. He can usually be found doing or saying something interesting – even outrageous - and that’s always fun. I like the fact that he puts himself out there and isn’t afraid to be mocked (which he usually is). I also really like his passion for film (and for actors) and his almost childlike response to both praise and criticism. But this post isn’t about Bhansali’s on-set tantrums, his complex relationships with other Bollywood personalities, his thwarted attempts to cast (and arguments with) Bebo, or his legendary love for his Maa… it’s about his work as a director.

Before taking on the directing mantle, Bhansali worked with prominent director Vidhu Vinod Chopra as assistant director (and screenwriter) on ‘1942: A Love Story’ (starring Anil Kapoor and Manisha Koirala), the classic gangster flick ‘Parinda’ (starring Nana Patekhar, Jackie Shroff and Anil Kapoor), and ‘Kareeb’ (with Bobby Deol and Neha). As an assistant director, SLB’s specialties were song picturisations, sound and dubbing – all very significant strengths that continue to be seen in the films he directs.

Since he started directing movies in 1996, Bhansali has certainly made a name for himself. More than that, he’s created a brand – there are certain things you can always expect to find in a Sanjay Leela Bhansali film. Here are what I think are 4 of his most striking trademarks:

Visual Appeal: nothing if not an aesthete (and one of the highest order), SLB loves to create beauty onscreen. He does lots of close-ups of his (usually stunning) stars, puts lots of painstaking detail into the composition of his scenes, and just always goes for the pretty… even in a mostly sober film like ‘Black’.

He also has a distinct fondness for colour… while ‘Devdas’ overdosed on lush reds and golds, ‘Saawariya’ is bathed in hues of blue… a fact memorably lampooned by Shahrukh Khan and Saif Ali Khan in their hilarious ‘Neela Neela’ sketch at the 2008 Filmfare Awards.



Romance & Tragedy: Bhansali loves a good, old-fashioned love story. Whether it’s a husband’s unrequited love (‘Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam’), a student’s love for her guru (‘Black’), an unstable girl’s overwhelming yearning for her storybook hero (‘Saawariya’), or a prostitute’s love for a drunken loser (‘Devdas’), there’s always a love story at the heart of SLB’s films.

And there’s also always elements of sadness and pain – in HDDCS Vanraj’s adoration of Nandini is pitted against Nandini’s love for Sameer; in ‘Black’ two lonely souls can only help each other to a certain extent; in ‘Saawariya’ Raj ends up broken-hearted despite his best attempts to sabotage Sakina's romance with Imaan; in ‘Devdas’ Chandramukhi’s pure and selfless love is poor proof against Devdas’s determination to self-destruct. There is rarely a happy ending for the protagonists in SLB’s tales of love, and even where there is one (as in HDDCS), it comes slowly and at a price (and it’s worth noting here that there are many who would disagree with me about HDDCS ending happily.)

Grandeur and Luxury: Bhansali loves to do things on a soaring, sweeping, grand scale. He loves to create fantasy in his films – an epic place far away from our mundane everyday lives… a place where strange, eventful things happen everyday. It’s never boring in his world.

His sets are so opulent as well… he likes gorgeous, glamorous things. Lots of lush, expensive silks, flowers, crystals and precious stones…. Sometimes, as with HDDCS, I love it. Sometimes, as with ‘Devdas’, I think he just goes way overboard! There was just way too much bling in that film… it just hurt my eyes sometimes!!

Music: SLB is very adventurous when it comes to the music in his films. He clearly adores music – his first film, ‘Khamoshi – The Musical’ was, as its name implies, a musical, and all his films have a strong musical element and lots of song picturisations (something I think he’s very good at). I also think he has a fantastic ear – something he doesn’t get much credit for. He is happy to take a chance on fresh, lesser-known musical talent – like Monty Sharma, Anjan Biswas and Ismail Darbar.

The music in his films is always so distinctive, creative and well-suited to the film. I think he is a genius at weaving songs into the fabric of his films… you can’t hear ‘Nimbooda’ without picturing Ash in HDDCS, ‘Chhabeela’ without thinking about Rani’s sass, ‘Dola Re Dola’ without picturing Madhuri and Ash in mid-twirl, or ‘Jab Se Tere Naina’ without picturing Ranbir in that infamous towel.

Bhansali is currently taking his love for music a step further by composing the songs for his 2010 project ‘Guzaarish’, a film which he calls ‘a tribute to Lata Mangeshkar’. Aishwarya and Hrithik, who made an effective jodi in ‘Dhoom II’ and ‘Jodhaa Akbar’, are set to co-star…. I think this is a pretty bold move; there aren't a lot of directors that also do good music (in mainstream Hindi cinema, I can only think of Vishal Bhardwaj at the moment (do you know of any others?) and of course Clint Eastwood in Hollywood).

Like most directors, SLB tends to work with the same crop of actors: Salman Khan shows up in 3 of his 5 films; and Aishwarya Rai, Rani Mukherjee and Zohra Sehgal show up in 2 each. He isn’t averse to new talent, though - he famously took a chance on two fresh faces when he cast Ranbir Kapoor and Sonam Kapoor in ‘Saawariya’. I think he gave each of them a really great showcase – the film may have flopped, but they each made very effective industry debuts. Others will disagree, but I think SLB is definitely an actor’s director. He may be a painstaking control freak, but I don’t think that he inhibits his actors – in fact, one might argue that he sometimes over-indulges them and fails to rein them in when necessary (case in point: SRK’s performance in ‘Devdas’).

I think he actually maximizes his actors’ talents – he capitalizes on Aishwarya’s beauty and formidable dancing skills while also giving her roles that maximize her modest acting talents. He capitalizes on Salman’s youthful exuberance while also allowing him to be shallow (apologies to Sallu fans – I like the guy, but I really don’t think he has loads of depth – and while we’re on the subject, I think SLB cast Salman appropriately in ‘Saawariya’ – let’s face it, his youthful charm has worn thin. This role (tiny as it was) had a little maturity to it, something Sallu Chacha desperately needs at this point). On the flipside, Bhansali gives Rani Mukherjee demanding roles (although he should have used her more in ‘Saawariya’ – she was the best thing about that film!), allowing her to put that powerhouse talent to good effect.

I also think the ability to write a screenplay that allows characters to grow, develop and express themselves through more than just their dialogues, is one of SLB’s strengths. I do sometimes think his focus on the characters’ nuances and foibles takes something away from the development of the story – sometimes (most strikingly in ‘Saawariya’) you’re just not sure where it’s all going. But I do think he writes a good screenplay.

Unlike Karan Johar, whose scriptwriting genius I find lies in his use of language and his ability to put together a thoroughly effective dialogue, I think Bhansali really knows how to ‘sketch’ a good scene – with SLB the body language and movements of the characters within their immediate environment is more important, more striking, than what actually comes out of their mouths. This I suppose is because he possibly thinks more in terms of visuals than words – something which can be a distinct strength (as in HDDCS – remember the chandelier scene, or the tram scene?) or a weakness (as in ‘Saawariya’ – great visuals, not a lot of substance). He seems happy to let someone else handle the dialogues while he focuses his energy on setting up his scenes and creating the ‘moment’.

Whew… who knew I had so much to say about Sanjay Leela Bhansali? He’s not even one of my favourite directors… anyway, to round off this roundup… I’ve seen 4 of Bhansali’s 5 films (I’m hoping to watch ‘Khamoshi’ soon – it’s generally very well-liked), and here are my brief thoughts on each of them….

BLACK: Rani Mukherjee hands in an amazing, sensitive performance as a blind, deaf and mute girl, Michelle McNally, who is helped by her teacher, Debraj Sahai (played by Amitabh Bachchan) to engage with the world around her. Later in life, Michelle gets a chance to return the favour. Ayesha Kapoor, the child actor who plays the young Michelle, is also pretty remarkable – speaking of which, Aamir Khan’s comments on the film kicked up quite a storm (see The Bollywood Fan's comments on the controversy here)…. I enjoyed this film for the stellar performances, the quietness, intensity and humanity of the drama, and the lovely dream-like quality it has.

HUM DIL DE CHUKE SANAM: HDDCS offers gorgeous visuals, beautiful music, and great performances by all the major players (especially Ajay Devgan, but Ash and Salman are very good too). Fake Italy (aka Hungary) really annoyed me – perhaps to an irrational extent, but I still really enjoyed it, and I love how it ended (although there are many who don’t). I think I’ve grown to appreciate it more with the passage of time, which doesn’t happen with a lot of films. I really love Filmi Girl’s 2-part write-up on the film – check it out.

DEVDAS: A very flawed film, but I think this is worth watching for the song picturisations, Madhuri Dixit’s poised, classy performance, Madhuri and Ash’s fantastic dancing, some excellent music, some very prettily staged scenes and Kirron Kher. I do so love SRK, but the less said about his highly annoying and unsympathetic portrayal of Devdas, the better. Oh dear.

SAAWARIYA: All the reviews of this film were so DIRE that I was pleasantly surprised by it. I didn’t love it, but it’s thankfully quite short, and worth watching for Rani’s sexy earthiness (especially in ‘Chhabeela’), Sonam’s gorgeousness, and of course, Ranbir in that towel… hot stuff. When I revisit this film, I watch ‘Chhabeela’ and ‘Jab Se Tere Naina’, flick through a couple of Sonam and Ranbir’s scenes, and really find that it’s not quite that bad!

WHO’S YOUR FAVOURITE KHAN?

I know there are quite a few Khans in Bollywood, but for the purposes of this tag, I am limiting myself to 4. No prizes for guessing which 4, though. It’s the 4 delicious actors who regularly make females (and a few males too) gasp with delight, and reach for their ice-cold Cokes (to cool them down) whenever they appear on their movie screens. Any Fardeen fans reading this, yes, I know he does it for you but he doesn’t quite make my list, sorry. Here, in descending order of preference, are ‘my’ 4 Khans.

1. SHAH RUKH KHAN:

Far and away my favourite of the 4 Khans. Why do I like SRK so much? It’s a combination of things: the fact that I get the feeling he is fearless about acting and will take on almost any part as long as he gets paid and gets a kick out of it. The fact that he seems so deliciously outspoken and diva-ish in real life – I always like divas, as long as they don’t go completely round-the-bend like MJ.

I like the fact that SRK obviously does not take himself too seriously and is just enjoying himself and having fun with every movie. I love the fact that SRK seems very human – slightly arrogant, slightly childish, a bit silly sometimes, trying to quit smoking, trying silly fashion trends – he seems real.

I love the fact that he is a great dancer and a great lip-syncher and that he’s cheap enough to dance for a fee at weddings. I love it when he gets all romantic and sweet. I love it when he gets all intense. Like Maja, I quite like his eyebrows. I love all his dumb same-y mannerisms – the shrug, the sideways look, the downward look, the hand through the hair, the sob-sob cry, the sniff-sniff laugh – I love it ALL. I think he is a very talented actor. He has been able to sell a distinctive product – himself. I love his nice physique. I love the fact that he climbed to the top from practically nothing and doesn’t seem to care that he’s hated for his success. Ok, I will stop. I’m probably nauseating someone right about now. But a couple more things:

I love his smile(s) – notice how he has variations:

sad smile – ‘no, Simran I won’t come to your wedding. I won’t come’

happy smile – ‘my little brother Laxman'

Happy smile - 'I got the pretty girl!' - from 'Yes Boss'

comical smile – in almost any scene with Johnny Lever in ‘Baadshah’

With Juhi in 'Yes Boss'

hot smile:

checking a babe out smile:
Checking Preity out in her borrowed Punjabi outfit in 'Veer Zaara'

People talk a lot about how all SRK’s characters are the same, but I actually don’t agree: for me, his cheeky annoying ‘DDLJ’ character is very different from his creepy ‘Darr’ character or his cute dorky-but-manly ‘Main Hoon Na’ character or his hot and oh-so-brave-and-regal ‘Asoka’ character. Anyway, as you can tell, I really like SRK – so I won’t bore you with any more details.
Favourite SRK performances: Main Hoon Na (absolutely LOVE this movie), Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge (he was annoying at first but very good - it probably shouldn't be here but I'm sentimental about the movie)

Least fave: Mohabbatein (awful fake-pretend violin-playing, was so sick of it), Pardes (he was okay but fought a bit too much. First time I wished he’d just die in a movie and be done with it. Needless to say, he denied me that small satisfaction)


2. AAMIR KHAN:

Why do I like this guy? He is a hardworking and intense actor (at least he appears to be). He’s got that alternative arty thing which can be quite sexy. He is cute and I love his eyes. He makes shortness look hot – see ‘Lagaan’ and ‘Mangal Pandey’. He has such a charming and natural smile – and those creases that appear at the sides of his eyes when he smiles really should be unattractive, but somehow aren’t. He can be funny, dramatic, subtle, serious, goofy, whatever you need him to be - and he's committed to being the best character actor he can be. You never get the sense that he's putting you on.

He can dance and lip-sync great. He makes his characters believable and real, and he makes you feel the energy and emotions of each character. Even when he does dreadful movies, he stands out. He is hot (but I think I’ve already said that). He’s always doing something different. You can really trace his development over the years - although he is a VERY natural talent (his early work shows so much star quality that it's almost blinding). Notice I have focused only on his acting, as I’m not sure what to make of him away from the movies (not that it’s any of my beeswax).

Aamir, Kajol, Ajay and Juhi doing ther best 'I'm weirdly stunned' look in 'Ishq' - Juhi obviously doesn't get it and falls back on her cuteness.
Aamir in his romantic-teenage-girl-pinup days, acting all defiant with Madhuri Dixit in 'Dil'. They had great chemistry in this film.

Favourite Aamir performances: Rangeela (didn’t like the film that much, but LOVED the way he said ‘Arre Milli’ in it – I know, ‘tis random), Dil Chahta Hai (loved the way he clowned around with the boys and with Preity. ‘Jaane kyon, jaane kyon, jaane kyon, jaane kyon, jaane kyon’ – sorry just having a brief DCH moment).

Least fave: Akele Hum, Akele Tum (he wasn’t actually bad in this movie, but I can’t get over the fact that it’s almost a scene-for-scene copy of Kramer v. Kramer; and when I hear that ‘Yes, I love you Daddy’ song that sounds kinda like the theme song from ‘Love Story’, I’m not sure whether to say ‘how cute’ or just to throw up.)


3. SAIF ALI KHAN:



I know... I could at least have found a photo that showed his face... but still.. it's a great view, ne-c'est-pas?

Reasons I love Saif Ali Khan. He’s cute. He does boyish very well. He does funny and charming very well. He does mischievous very well. BUT I’m finding he also does serious, mature and deep very well. I like the fact that he seems to be growing and developing as an actor. He’s an expressive and honest actor. He throws himself into each movie. He’s cool. He seems intelligent. He seems like good fun. He seems like the boy-next-door despite having famous parents (although I've heard he's not as down-to-earth as he seems). He seems like a guy who is just trying to make it – aww, bless his heart. He’s been a bit 'controversial' by marrying an older woman for love – I like that, even if it didn’t work out. He’s cute – but I think I already said that.

Favourite Saif performances: Kal Ho Naa Ho (he totally overshadowed my SRK in this movie. I loved the chemistry between his character and SRK’s character), Parineeta (in a challenging role, I think he did very well – I was impressed).

Least fave: You know what? I actually haven’t badly disliked Saif in any movies yet (at least, the ones I’ve seen) and haven’t disliked any of his movies badly either. Will update this as soon as I do. It’s bound to happen eventually.


4. SALMAN KHAN:


So, Uzo, I get to finally answer your question. Why is Salman my least favourite Khan? You know what? It’s hard to express. But like my little sis would say: ‘I just don’t like him’. Maybe it’s that sugar-sweet, I’m so cute, I’m so funny, I’m so fake-pretend half-Italian (ok, I know, low blow, that wasn’t actually his fault) thing he does sometimes. Maybe it’s the fact that he is determined to show off his pecs NO MATTER WHAT. He just has to take that shirt off and pump some iron at some point. Maybe I think the pecs are a little too large and He-Man-ish for my personal taste.


Maybe he’s just too cheesy and over-eager. Maybe he tries a little too hard ‘Neelam? He he. Yo Neelam!’ Maybe he just feels very ’80s to me – and not in a cute ‘Hello, is it me you’re looking for’, Cosby Show-ish way; more like in a bad the-guys-from-the-A Night at the Roxbury-movie-or-whatever-that-Will-Ferrell-movie-was-called; Rico-Suave-ish way. For some reason, in his real life he seems rather insecure and a bit of a baby at his not-exactly-spring-chicken-ish age – and what was that whole thing with Aishwarya? Didn’t she say he abused her or something? And did he really shoot a croc or something crazy like that? Ok, I’ll get off the personal life track now before I confuse anyone. This is supposed to be about his acting.

The truth is, having said all that, Salman is not that bad. He may be my least favourite Khan, but I’ve enjoyed several movies he’s been in. Really and truly I have.

Favourite Salman performance: Chori Chori Chupke Chupke (he was really good in this film, which had a really silly storyline but got by on good acting), Hum Aapke Hain Koun (he was young, wide-eyed and kinda goofy-cute, and he said ‘Painting, bhaiyya, painting, which was kinda cute)
Salman, Rani and borrowed baby in 'Chori Chori Chupke Chupke'

Least fave: Lucky – No Time for Love (this is an absolutely painful watch and should be seen by no-one), Pyaar Kiya To Darna Kya (once he did his shirtless-rock-star number, not even the presence of my screen faves Dharmendra, Kajol and VK could make this finish this film – drats, I could have had 5 movies on my Dharmendra-movies-I’ve-seen list. LOL

Who’s tagged?

Did I mention that this was a tag? So, I tag the following lucky 4 ‘Khans’:

Beth Loves Bollywood
Maja
Sheetal Makhan
T-Hype

I hope someone on the above list is up to this (and if no-one really is, someone please just take pity on me and do it anyway). Basically (and as briefly or longwinded-ly as you like), what’s your order of preference for the 4 Khans, and which 2 performances of each one do you like most and dislike most?

AND HERE I AM, EATING MY WORDS…

Okay, alright, I was wrong. I take back ‘whatever’ I said plus jara. PRIYANKA CHOPRA CAN ACT! (Am I the only one who notices the ‘whatevers’ in English subtitles of Hindi films?) But yes, I admit it, Priyanka really can act. I take back all I said about the ‘vacant-ness’ in her acting in a previous post (scroll down to see my 'Bluffmaster' post). Sadly, being a very inept blogger, I don’t know how you do that cool thing when you link things without having the ugly ol’ link show.

Anyway, my volte-face is as a result of just seeing ‘Yakeen’, which stars Priyanka Chopra and Arjun Rampal. From the opening scene, Priyanka captured my attention. Her character, Simar, was nicely developed and fleshed out. Priyanka made her interesting. I was impressed, and now I happily admit that although she isn’t that good in some films, girlfriend can actually act.

‘Yakeen’ is about a man (named ‘Nikhil’, played by Rampal) who loses his memory after a terrible accident, and has to rebuild his life with the support of his wife (‘Simar’, played by P. Chopra). In the process, he falls in love (with wifey, that is), but later discovers that things are not quite what they seem. As a Bollywood thriller, ‘Yakeen’ is not bad, but it’s certainly not a masterpiece either.

I liked the waaay-over-the-top bit in this film where Nikhil shouts ‘Simar, I love you!’ in the mountains. I’m not sure if it’s a conscious tribute (probably is, though), but there’s a scene in ‘Aradhana’ (starring Rajesh Khanna and Sharmila Tagore) where Arun (played by Khanna) shouts in the mountains, ‘Vandana, I love you!’, and Vandana (played by Tagore) very shyly and sweetly does her own ‘Arun, I love you!’ shout. I know, it’s sickening (my sister can’t even bear to watch that scene in ‘Aradhana’), but hey, it’s Bollywood.

Rampal is quite good in some parts of this movie, and less competent (even a little boring to watch) in others. Overall, I would say he’s good. I like the fact that his pre-accident Nikhil and post-accident Nikhil are so distinct from each other, even in mannerisms. I’m glad to say the actress who plays Nikhil’s secretary in ‘Yakeen’ does a very competent job. See my comment on actors playing secretaries in my 'Okada ka Rishta' post (scroll down to read). The music in ‘Yakeen’ is pretty good, but a lot of it sounds like I’ve heard it before. But it’s good.

There’s a fair bit of fake-pretend (again, credit to Beth for the term) piano-playing by Priyanka in this film. Can they just stop doing this? Although Priyanka’s fake-pretend instrument-playing is bad, I’ve seen worse in Bollywood. The worst I’ve seen so far was SRK in ‘Mohabbatein’. His fake-pretend violin playing was simply awful, and it seemed like he did it for at least 92% of the movie. The filmmakers must’ve thought he was doing it well. Er, noo. I was so excited to see Dilip Kumar in ‘Ram aur Shyam’ (very good – but old - movie) playing an instrument correctly. That was cool.

The makers of this film obviously have some sort of shower fixation – there were 2 shower scenes. And not to forget, the obligatory rain scene… (see my post on rain scenes in my 'Teri Meheribaniyan' review).

Come on now, nobody but nobody looks this good standing in the rain...

Props to Priyanka, her performance in this film is really quite good, and I shall now proceed to be silent on the subject of her acting skills. For now.

OKADA KA RISHTA, DIL KA RISHTA, AISHWARYA RAI AND THE FRENZY OF ECSTASY

I’ll start this post off with my okada fantasy. For any non-Nigerians reading this, an ‘okada’ is a commercial motorcycle, sort of like a cab on 2 wheels. So, anyway, I was on an okada last night and closed my eyes… and transported myself to a fictional Bollywood world. I was on a beautiful black and silver motorbike behind a handsome Bollywood star (first it was Abhishek, then it was Hrithik, then it was Dharmendra (but much much younger)). The wind was blowing through my hair (well, it actually was in real life), and there was lovely music playing in the background. We were somewhere in Bangalore, I think. It was lovely. The one thing I could not do, which I would definitely have done if my fantasy were real, was hold on tight to my Bollywood hero. NEVER! The VERY last thing you want to do on an okada is touch the okada-man. No disrespect to okada men everywhere (it’s an occupational hazard), but they aren’t very clean, to say the least (and some of them are pervs, but this certainly isn’t exclusive to okada-men). Anyway, I eventually opened my eyes and returned to the real world. My okada man went through a mucky puddle and splashed water on both of us (eww), I gave him a scolding and got off five minutes later at my house. Well, it sure was a nice fantasy while it lasted.

Okay, on to ‘Dil Ka Rishta’ (DKR), starring the khoobsurat Aishwarya Rai. I wasn’t really expecting much from this movie, basically because I hadn’t heard anything about it before I got it, and also because it doesn’t star any of my favourite actors (Ash is beautiful and dances beautifully, but she’s not a great acting talent, in my opinion). I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. It was good enough to keep my attention. I guess it’s good to have low expectations – if I’d been expecting to really enjoy this one, I just might have been disappointed.

Check out those pots... colour-coded to match Aishwarya's outfit.

DKR starts out with Aishwarya’s character (Tia) stomping all over a man’s heart (his name is Jai, and he’s played by Arjun Rampal) when he summons up the courage to tell her he loves her. Instead of at least giving him a polite ‘no’, she looks horrified, runs away and jumps on her boyfriend Raj’s bike (Raj appears just in time). At first, I thought this was harsh, but it turns out that Jai is a big fat LOSER, and the chump flat out deserved it.

Interestingly, by the end of the film, Tia is all over Jai (yes, the same Jai), like a brazen hussy. She wants him to love and marry her so badly, it’s almost embarrassing. She throws herself at him, but he’s not biting. Why? That’s what this film is all about – the bit in the middle.

"Hey, Jai, I love you and I know you love me, so put that anklet on my ankle and marry me NOW, dammit!!"

"I wish... I wish... I wish Jai would just fall in love with me and marry me already!"

"Come on, Jai... you know you want to."

And the bit in the middle is the good bit in DKR. The lead actors are all pretty competent. Arjun Rampal, who I haven’t liked in anything else I’ve seen him in, is quite nice here, and so is the guy who plays Raj – can’t remember his name. I recognised the actor who plays Jai’s dad in the movie from ‘Hera Pheri’. He was good in this film if a bit of a meddler (a huge humongous gi-normous meddler, actually). The legendary Rakhee is also in this movie, and is as good as ever, even though I haven’t quite forgiven her for breaking Amitabh Bachchan’s heart (well, technically, the heart of his fictional character, Sikandar) over 30 years ago in the film ‘Muqaddar Ka Sikandar’ (which, by the way, is a good film). The woman who plays Jai’s secretary is absolutely dreadful. What is it with secretaries in films – does the role go to a family member of the film-makers for kicks or what? They are consistently bad. The music in DKR is quite good, especially the title track. And I like the fact that the storyline tackles the issue of drink driving, which is an important issue that often gets overlooked. If the film makes one person stop his/her drunken friend from getting behind the wheel of a car, then it will have done a great service.

Random thought: there’s also a café called ‘Café Bistro’ in the film, which struck me as quite funny. Another random thought: Don’t you just love how Bollywood films create fake-pretend illnesses (I borrowed the term ‘fake-pretend’ from Beth, she who loves Bollywood)? I mean, they just create all kinds of sicknesses, unknown to medical science, just to propel their storyline. (He has a rare type of disease, a timpanic dysfunction where he can only hear words spoken from the lips of the one he loves – hey, I’ve just come up with one!). And don't even get me started on fake-pretend cures to fake-pretend illnesses. I must admit I like that sort of resourcefulness. After all, new diseases are discovered everyday, hai na? Up fake-pretend illnesses!! As we say in Nigeria, ‘carry go!’

But back to DKR: although the character of Jai is a LOSER, he does kinda sorta shape up by the end, and I kinda sorta liked him. But the ending is a bit annoying. They find a way to patch things up very nicely (and in true Bollywood style unrealistically) and emerge with a happy family and smiles all round, but… what about Raj? I really, really liked him. Is he now going to be forgotten while Tia and Jai now play happy families? Is his son going to be raised as another man’s child? Is it fair for Tia to just move on with her Jai while forgetting all about her husband (although it’s not her fault)? And why am I now Raj’s champion? (Hmmm… just realised the 3 main characters all had 3-letter names: Raj, Tia, Jai). Anyway, like I said, the end is annoying, but the film ain’t half-bad.

Aishwarya is alright in this film, as she is in most of her movies. She looks great, dances great, and acts – not great, but good. And I noticed something interesting about her in DKR… she had a ‘frenzy of ecstasy’ (or two, or three). In fact, I realised that in almost every Ash film, they manage to covertly sneak in one or two frenzies of ecstasy. What is a frenzy of ecstasy, you ask? I’ll show you a couple from DKR:

Okay, so both photos are from the same frenzy of ecstasy.. but it was a long one.

And here are a couple of frenzies of ecstasy from ‘Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam’:

And there’s even a semi-frenzy-of-ecstasy in ‘Devdas’. You can see it rising in the eyes, but doesn’t quite become full-blown. A mini-frenzy-of-ecstasy, if you like:

BollyBitch, who has a really great blog (the link is on my sidebar) has a photo of Aishwarya having a very unattractive frenzy of ecstasy at some press event. Go look at it, I know you want to.

So that’s a frenzy of ecstasy.

For me, the star of this film (DKR), though, is this guy:

He is just so adorable, and the camera absolutely loves him! Cute little guy!

But if I were his mum and dad, I sure as hell wouldn’t be letting anyone to do this to him, especially so close to a precipice like that!! Sheesh!!!